Ask E. Jean - Tormented? Driven Witless? Whipsawed by confusion?

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How do you know when it's best to reveal your true feelings versus keeping it to yourself? Does the anxiety of not knowing mean you shouldn't do it?

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    I say there is nothing wrong with being genuine about your feelings. But there is no point in going overboard.

    If you like someone, you can say that you like them or enjoy spending time with them or they are funny and you like that, etc.

    It does not mean that you must, even if you are thinking it or wondering about it, leap in and say I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you after only knowing them for a short time.

    Often these things go back and forth. You date, he calls again or you make plans and he agrees. You start spending more time with each other, talk, he says something to indicate he really likes you, you reciprocate, etc. etc. until you get to the natural conclusion.

    There is no need to hold everything back or blurt everything out. Let it grow organically, saying and doing what comes naturally at the moment.

    As for feeling nervous, well, I think we all feel that way a little if we are thinking of taking a big step but it does not necessarily mean you shouldn't do it unless the feeling has something to back it up from what the other person has said.

    reply to Josephine
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    Agreed, nothing wrong with letting someone know how you feel. But there's a balance ... like Josephine pointed out.

    reply to Mercy_me
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