I would definitely call the person out, but in private and one-on-one.

Not in a cruel or mean way. I would simply take the person aside and explain that everyone is talking about the lie and that your mutual circle has lost respect for this person because of the lie.

I would also ask gently what prompted the lie and try to figure out a way to help the person back from it, whether that involves the person apologizing or you making some behind-the-scenes phone calls to smooth things over.

We all get lost sometimes, and we all do stupid things. I wouldn't cut this person out without trying to salvage things.

Here is the issue with people who lie like this for attention or whatever else - they are so desperate for it that they actually begin to believe the lie. They think the lie is the truth, no matter how outlandish.

I personally would call them out on it because sometimes people need a wakeup call that the world isn't falling for it anymore.

I guess it depends on what the lie was and how close I was to her.

If I was close to her, I'd probably say something to her and ask why she felt the need to lie.

If I wasn't close to her and thought the lie was just about her own arrogance, to get attention, I don't think I'd say anything because me knowing she was lying would be enough. I feel sorry for people like that.

It does depend on the lie. Is this the first time your friend has lied? I would maybe speak to your friend in private and ask if everything is ok?

I'm stuck on the Friends episode where someone screams at Ross,

"SOMEtimes it's 'WHO' !! "

M, even after being the person that's your advice?

Is that because calling her out would do no good?

anon, my feeling always is, as a friend you should say something. well, wait, I say always but it depends on the lie and if it would do more than just embarrass her/him to say something. Does this person need to be shocked out of acting this way or would it just be more considerate to let it slide?

my point is - rather than lose respect maybe it could raise compassion...

It depends on how this effects your friendship and if it comes up in conversation. Without knowing what the lie was, I probably would bring it up in time based on principle because I am stickler for leading a life that is conscious and aware and I can't stand liars, cheats and people who refuse to be responsible with their words.

I would ask a lot of leading questions until the person knew that I knew the jig was up. I would not be snarky or call their bluff in front of other people because you will embarrass this person, and they will see this as a personal attack or worse, lose self esteem.

I agree with everything that's been said (esp. the pulling them aside and asking them discreetly) ...

I wonder if this person doesn't realize other people are listening? I just realized the other day that I look like I'm contradicting myself (on here) because I talk about my huge student loan debt, but I also talk about how I worked my way through school. I probably look like a liar. But both stories are true (and, btw, I do not have my timeline of my life straight in my head at all ... I hafto really think vvv hard to remember when I lived where and which jobs I had when) ... but I probably look a bit off to the careful observer.

Could this be the case with her?

Or is it possible that she doesn't realize people are paying attention to her (and she was just proving it to herself with whatever lie she told)? Is that a possibility?

Again, I tend to side with the other Vixens' advice, but I am trying to think of some possibilities that you may not have thought of. My ideas may be completely useless, and that's fine :o)

I'm sorry but didn't you just say on another thread that you fibbed on your resume? If that is not being a liar, cheat or irresponsible with words, I'm not sure what is.

Show me someone who doesn't fib on their resume and I will show you someone who is unemployed.

I was commenting on the hypocrisy.

I have never lied on a resume or fibbed and I have been steadily employed. I am guessing there are many others on here who do not as well because it's sneaky and backhanded and some employers actually check.

Just because you may need to lie on a resume does not mean we all do, so do not make sweeping generalizations.

Well, Alison, she said FIB. I very much doubt she did something like add a degree or a job she never had - that was not the point at all. It doesn't hurt anyone to add a week or two to an assignment to make it look like one is currently employed since employers are doing the WRONG thing by discriminating against the unemployed.

and, I don't know who you are, but I must point out that I do not see ONE positive comment on your profile so I won't be hurt by your little insult here.

I don't know who you are either and not sure why you feel it necessary to fight someone else's battle.

Oh, not fighting someone else's battle. I just like to get my opinion in on everything!

Yes I saw you just did that on another thread as well. What an annoying quality to have. Tell you what, I will work on positive comments and you work on keeping your mouth shut when things do not involve you.