Ask E. Jean - Tormented? Driven Witless? Whipsawed by confusion?

Advice Vixens

Hi Vixens, So I'm a NYC gal who was raised in the big city and chose to remain here to make a name for herself in the publishing industry. Recently I've been on a few online dates with guys who seem a little judgmental of the fact that I've never lived elsewhere. (For the record, I'm well traveled, so it's not like I never left New York.) What gives? Is it really that freakish that I remained in the city all this time?

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    Carly
    Online dating is weird. People get judgemental over weird shit. Ignore it and move on.

    I've lived in NY my whole life, left for college, and came back right after and don't see myself leaving. Anyone who finds that weird can kiss my awesome NY ass haha.

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    Keka

    Really? This puzzles me, I cannot imagine that anyone would get judgmental over something like that, especially if you are indeed well traveled, much less several guys!

    Could it be that is something else that they are judgmental about, maybe close mindedness or unwillingness to try other things?

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    Darrah
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    Maggie
    If you had never ever once stepped outside of Hicksville, Ohio (yes, it's a real place and I lived all of my childhood w/in 30 miles of it), I would understand why someone would be so tetchy.

    ***EDIT*** Ridiculous (the man/men).

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    Carly
    Maggie wrote: If you had never ever once stepped outside of Hicksville, Ohio (yes, it's a real place and I lived all of my childhood w/in 30 miles of it), I would understand why someone would be so tetchy. ***EDIT*** Ridiculous (the man/men).

    I get it. For some reason people who moved to NYC from outside of the tri-state area think they are hot shit because they made the move to the big bad city. Not all of them, but a lot. So when they meet native new yorkers, they get all "oh I"m cooler because I had to go far to come to NY." People are weird.

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    Josephine
    I honestly do not see what the big deal is here. Everyone has to live somewhere.

    I would understand their attitude more if you said that under no circumstances would you ever, ever consider moving anywhere else and they were also committed to where they lived, but even then it would be a problem coming from each of you.

    Someone that quick to find fault is more trouble than they are worth. And if you are committed to staying there for work or just because you love it, then seek out like minded people.

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    Maggie
    Carly wrote: I get it. For some reason people who moved to NYC from outside of the tri-state area think they are hot shit because they made the move to the big bad city. Not all of them, but a lot. So when they meet native new yorkers, they get all "oh I"m cooler because I had to go far to come to NY." People are weird.

    That's just ridiculous.

    I mean, it's not like NYC is necessarily boring. There's a helluvalot to do there. I suppose a person could make it boring if they really wanted to?

    Anybody with this strange snobby attitude can gth.

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    Carly
    Maggie wrote: That's just ridiculous. I mean, it's not like NYC is necessarily boring. There's a helluvalot to do there. I suppose a person could make it boring if they really wanted to? Anybody with this strange snobby attitude can gth.

    Oh I agree. Absolutely ridiculous.

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    Samantha
    I think you might be reading too much into their "judgement."

    As someone who's moved around a lot, I could see myself saying, "Wow, I can't imagine living the same place your whole life..." Not because I don't like people who have lived the same place their whole life, but because it's different than what I've done, so it's mysterious and...well, weird to me. But not weird in a bad way. Just different.

    I also can't imagine being an accountant for a living. But I don't dislike accountants. My sister's an accountant.

    I think you might have mistaken wonderment for judgement. Unless, of course, they said, "What kind of idiot stays the same place their whole life!?"

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