Ask E. Jean - Tormented? Driven Witless? Whipsawed by confusion?

Advice Vixens

V-V-V-V-VIXENSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Firstly, I must apologize to E. Jean for the telephone message I left her tonight. Though I meant every word of it.

Secondly, I got a lovely girl's number tonight. Had planned on phoning her tomorrow. Is that ideal?

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    Alek,

    Sure why not if you like her. I hate it when a guy gets my number then takes forever to call. Do what feels right to you.

    Nay

    reply to Nay
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    Yes, I think tomorrow is perfect. Just don't call her a million times. And don't say whatever you said to E. Jean. If you had to apologize, I'm guessing it wasn't a nice message.

    reply to Greeny
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    Greeny wrote: Yes, I think tomorrow is perfect. Just don't call her a million times. And don't say whatever you said to E. Jean. If you had to apologize, I'm guessing it wasn't a nice message.

    I professed my undying love for her, is all. And I had to apologize because it was 1 in the morning or thereabouts.

    reply to Alek
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    Alek wrote: I professed my undying love for her, is all. And I had to apologize because it was 1 in the morning or thereabouts.

    That makes sense. But don't do that to the new girl. Not yet anyway ;)

    reply to Greeny
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    Hahaha. Oh Alek.

    Yes, call her tomorrow! Err... today.

    reply to Lilo
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    I would call her if I were you. When I give a guy my number, I usually wait around all day the next day wishing he would call me.


    lol. Did you drunk dial auntie eee? That's fuuuurny.

    reply to Julia
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    If she took the time to give you her number, she's probably staring at her phone right now, willing you to CALL.

    reply to Karma
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    Yeah, call her. But wait to set a date. Tease her a lil' y'know? Give it some slack, then reeel 'er in, and give it some slack, then reeeel 'er in, and give it some slack, then reeel 'er in.


    Also, I wish I could drunk dial vixens, too, luckybutt.

    reply to Karla
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    Alek wrote: I professed my undying love for her, is all. And I had to apologize because it was 1 in the morning or thereabouts.

    If I had a guy call me at 1am professing his undying love for me, I'd promptly get dressed, start the car, pick him up and drive to Kentucky, where you don't have to have a blood test, and get married.

    As for calling the chick- I'd wait a day, or two. This will make her think you aren't some hard-up freak she gave her number to. Like Karla said- tease -a little. Reeling in is the fun part.

    reply to Bad Beth And Beyond
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    You can't know how she will feel if you call now or later. So just do what you want to do and let the chips fall.

    reply to Leslie
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    You're the sweetest thing ever.

    reply to Karla
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    After you and I finished talking last night and I got on the bus, she just so happened to be on it as well, along with some of my friends who had left the party a whopping hour earlier (they got lost on the way to the bus stop). So we all went out for Vietnamese, and she now has my number.

    reply to Alek
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    Julia wrote: I would call her if I were you. When I give a guy my number, I usually wait around all day the next day wishing he would call me. lol. Did you drunk dial auntie eee? That's fuuuurny.

    No, I drunk dialed Miss Beth. I drunk answering-machined E. Jean.

    reply to Alek
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    Karla's excellent advice was my original plan. Call her and make sure she still digs me without a beer in her hand, but wait to make a date.

    And Amy, when do I NOT let the Vixens into the inner workings of the male mind?

    reply to Alek
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    Keka wrote: What am I, cole slaw?

    Cole slaw is tasty.

    reply to Alek
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    Alek wrote: No, I drunk dialed Miss Beth. I drunk answering-machined E. Jean.

    lol. definitely call the charming lady.


    she's undoubtedly waiting for you to.

    reply to Julia
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    Hi Alex,

    You and your bad self should definitely call her tomorrow. Or text. Texting is good.

    reply to Kent
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    Yes, definitely call her ASAP. And ask her out on a date.

    reply to Blondie
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    Alek, my sweet. Call that lucky lady, but in the name of all that is right in the world, please do not call her once you have started drinking. You may even want to hide that phone if you think she may find herself on your Drink-n-Dial list. Thatís no way to break in a new filly. Calling or texting tonight sounds right to me Ė but only before you hit the saucy stuff.

    reply to Precious
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    Precious wrote: Alek, my sweet. Call that lucky lady, but in the name of all that is right in the world, please do not call her once you have started drinking. You may even want to hide that phone if you think she may find herself on your Drink-n-Dial list. Thatís no way to break in a new filly. Calling or texting tonight sounds right to me Ė but only before you hit the saucy stuff.

    Who said I was going to drink tonight...?

    reply to Alek
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    Are you an Avartar-zan or what? Let Jane get her beauty sleep and call her like a civilized chap tomorrow, as planned.

    ---M

    reply to Mary
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    Mary wrote: Are you an Avartar-zan or what? Let Jane get her beauty sleep and call her like a civilized chap tomorrow, as planned. ---M

    Yes, exactly. Though I posted this question at 4:00 this morning, I refer to today as "tomorrow" (ie. after sleep).

    reply to Alek
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    Definitely call her tomorrow! Hmmm, or have you already? (hehehe) You will tell us how it goes, heh?

    reply to Tracey
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    After you call her ... let us know if she gave you her actual phone number!

    reply to Sally G.
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    Don't waste time call her today. Tomorrow she may be attached.

    reply to Suzanna
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    Absolutely call her tomorrow. If for no other reason, why not get it over with? While waiting a few days might build the anticipation for her, it could also (and unnecessarily) build the anticipation for you, which could result in a mess of a conversation. Besides, if she finds you needy for calling so soon, then you know right off the bat that she's high maintenance. It's almost always best to lay your cards on the table--especially early on while the stakes are low.

    reply to Samantha
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    Alek wrote: Who said I was going to drink tonight...?

    Call it Vixen's Intuition.

    reply to Precious
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    Precious wrote: Call it Vixen's Intuition.

    Good guess, but your intuition requires a tune-up.

    reply to Alek
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    Sally G. wrote: After you call her ... let us know if she gave you her actual phone number!

    Well, it was her actual phone number.

    reply to Alek
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    Glad it was the right number. Could this possibly turn into a Reality Series as you keep us all posted?! A "...lovely girl's number.." probly wants a nice conversation since it's the correct #!

    reply to RockinGoldenGirl
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    Call, already, call. Give your right hand a rest.

    reply to ehvwon
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    Alek,
    WHY oh WHY is this post here????

    reply to jeannie`
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    Alek....
    The fact you said "Lovely girl" and not "hot chick" speaks for itself. If you want to get to know this girl for her and her alone... and not solely a roll in the sheets... then call her, Look at your motives, we women are not looking to be friends for an hour then presented with a bedroom invitation.... BUT we do want to talk and be friends BEFORE we jump in the sack. We are women, we are not dead!
    When in doubt... what would your grandmother tell you to do... or would you introduce this "lovely girl" to her.....
    Your time is valuable , shouldn't the people you spend in it be just as valuable?

    reply to Erin
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    jeannie` wrote: Alek, WHY oh WHY is this post here????

    Because I typed the text and clicked "post".

    reply to Alek
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    Sugah wrote: Did you call? Do it, do it.

    I did, I did! We're having coffee Tuesday.

    reply to Alek
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    Erin wrote: Alek.... The fact you said "Lovely girl" and not "hot chick" speaks for itself. If you want to get to know this girl for her and her alone... and not solely a roll in the sheets... then call her, Look at your motives, we women are not looking to be friends for an hour then presented with a bedroom invitation.... BUT we do want to talk and be friends BEFORE we jump in the sack. We are women, we are not dead! When in doubt... what would your grandmother tell you to do... or would you introduce this "lovely girl" to her..... Your time is valuable , shouldn't the people you spend in it be just as valuable?

    Great advice, Erin. Thank you.

    Luckily, I was not infected at an early age with the near-incurable disease that inhibits men from seeing a woman as anything but a collection of arousing body parts mashed together.

    reply to Alek
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    Definitely call her. Women like to know that they are liked by men, that is not a myth. And besides, the waiting game is for kiddies. And if you are adult looking for some grown people action, you should behave as such. I called my now husband, the night we exchanged numbers, and he told me back then he was very impressed by my forwardness and moxie. But it doesn't mean you have to / or will get married to (if you don't want to) Hope I didn't scare you off... I'm just saying you by doing what you want to do (and not following any holding patterns) you should get any of the results you are looking for out of the situation.

    reply to Ms. Ade
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    Best of luck, Alek.

    Don't forget those mints. ;]

    reply to Karla
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    Karla wrote: Best of luck, Alek. Don't forget those mints. ;]

    I'd better not. She's a non-smoker, which means I will likely feel compelled to quit again if this goes anywhere. So I'll be sucking back the Fisherman's Friends and nicotine substitutes like there's no tomorrow.

    reply to Alek
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    Alek, Glad to hear you're going out for coffee! Smart man--if you'd suggested dinner, that's too much too soon. If you hadn't called her, she would've been a little hurt, especially after you two winding up on the same bus! (What are the odds for that? Probably Carl Sagan's billion and billions.) This could actually be the start of something really nice in your life. Just relax and once the two of you are sitting at a small table with your coffee... concentrate on her. Look into her eyes, wait for her to finish her thought, smile. You're already different from many other guys she's been around or heard about, I guarantee it. Help her on with her coat if it's chilly as you leave; do the Perfectly-Mannered Male bit and she'll be stunned. Unfortunately you probably don't have time to get something impressive from Rent-A-Dragon, because frankly they have a terrible supply problem (men don't turn them back in without damage and getting new ones sometimes takes weeks) but assure her you would gladly defend her with swordplay from dragons, spiders, wasps, etc. and check to see how you like her laugh. Have a great date!

    reply to TJ
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    Right on, Alek! I usually wait two days. But hell, if you like her, there's no other way.




    reply to John
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    D
    Alek wrote: Great advice, Erin. Thank you. Luckily, I was not infected at an early age with the near-incurable disease that inhibits men from seeing a woman as anything but a collection of arousing body parts mashed together.

    And that's (only part of) why we all adore you.

    Good luck with her!

    reply to D
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    TJ wrote: Alek, Glad to hear you're going out for coffee! Smart man--if you'd suggested dinner, that's too much too soon. If you hadn't called her, she would've been a little hurt, especially after you two winding up on the same bus! (What are the odds for that? Probably Carl Sagan's billion and billions.) This could actually be the start of something really nice in your life. Just relax and once the two of you are sitting at a small table with your coffee... concentrate on her. Look into her eyes, wait for her to finish her thought, smile. You're already different from many other guys she's been around or heard about, I guarantee it. Help her on with her coat if it's chilly as you leave; do the Perfectly-Mannered Male bit and she'll be stunned. Unfortunately you probably don't have time to get something impressive from Rent-A-Dragon, because frankly they have a terrible supply problem (men don't turn them back in without damage and getting new ones sometimes takes weeks) but assure her you would gladly defend her with swordplay from dragons, spiders, wasps, etc. and check to see how you like her laugh. Have a great date!

    Thanks! I take great pride in being one of few young gentlemen left in this society. Rest assured I will open the car door for her as well.

    reply to Alek
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    D wrote: And that's (only part of) why we all adore you. Good luck with her!

    You're such a sweet talker.

    reply to Alek
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    D
    Alek wrote: You're such a sweet talker.

    I try. ;-)

    reply to D
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    John wrote: Right on, Alek! I usually wait two days. But hell, if you like her, there's no other way.

    I think it would have been ideal to wait longer if we didn't all ready know each other. We had classes together in first year, and only met again for the first time in three years at another party last month.

    Fuck, I'm doing exactly what we've all told countless people NOT to do on this website: overthinking it. I will not post again on this thread.

    reply to Alek
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    D
    Alek wrote: I think it would have been ideal to wait longer if we didn't all ready know each other. We had classes together in first year, and only met again for the first time in three years at another party last month. Fuck, I'm doing exactly what we've all told countless people NOT to do on this website: overthinking it. I will not post again on this thread.

    The only reason you're overthinking it is because you're interested. If you weren't, you wouldn't give her or this situation a second thought.

    reply to D
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    As long as your not too forward and keep it casual, a phone call is probably your best bet! Good luck!

    reply to Kellen
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    Of course you should call her, wait till the end of the day though so she will be thinking about you for most of it!

    reply to Millie
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    Alek wrote: I think it would have been ideal to wait longer if we didn't all ready know each other. We had classes together in first year, and only met again for the first time in three years at another party last month. Fuck, I'm doing exactly what we've all told countless people NOT to do on this website: overthinking it. I will not post again on this thread.

    I agree completely. If you've already known her for awhile, there's no wasting time.

    Pick up that phone bubs, and good luck.

    reply to John
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    Yeah, calling tomorrow is definitely a good idea. One time, I gave my number to a guy & he called me that night. I was like, "Slow down, buddy!" but then again, if he takes too long, I get aggravated. Call her the next day for a quick chat. If she gets off the phone first, don't be discouraged. I make it a rule when a guy calls me the first few times to always be the one to hang up first. It lets him know that I've got more going on besides waiting for his phone calls and if he really likes me, he'll call again. :)

    reply to gina
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    I'm available to write a letter of recommendation.

    I would have preferred to hear that you asked her to dinner, but coffee is good.

    I shall approve this new development in your love life, as my sister is otherwise indisposed.

    Edited to add: Back when I was single, I expected a man who asked for my phone number to use it within 24 hours.

    reply to Raven
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    Hey Alek,

    Good to see you called brother -- whenever a female friend asks me about guys who delay the first-ever check-in, I always say the same thing:

    "Boys wait -- men call.'

    I am yet to meet a woman who feels otherwise...enjoy the java --

    IJ

    reply to IJ
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    You know, the phone number thing is a flawed system. It needs changing. We're in the millenium, let's flow with the technology here. For example, in Korea ALL apartments have keypads to unlock your door (instead of keys...KEYS.) Keys are soooooooo 1990's, they just shake in your pocket and poke your thigh and shit (girls with purses, this does not really apply.)

    Anyhow, there should be email exchanges instead of phone numbers. It's just so much better on so many levels. Emails are better thought out and safer. No more professing love at 1 AM (which I have done, too.) Also, it's not quite a text message since I agree that text messages are for wimps. Let's roll with this technology. Who is with me? ahhhh...maybe I don't want an answer to that question.

    reply to Hyun
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    First of all you should wipe that self-assured look of your face, you look like someone that trust to much in its own fate.

    You know who else trusts a lot in that?

    communists.

    Yes, I'm not afraid to say it, the red menace. Your whole "Gee... don't know what to do about her, I'm so cute" masquerade is over. This great nation will not abide the misuse of a telephone number that was built upon the victories of brave men. That girl will not be texted by you or by any of your rum drinkers beard wearers perverted little ungodly mannered comrades.

    God as my witness, I say to thee: "Don't you dare texting her".


    End of message.


    reply to The General
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    Of course it's ideal to call tomorrow, why not? Why in the hell not? What girl doesn't want attention and to hear from a man?

    Keep it light, ask about her, be intetested, be present and make her laugh. Make her feel safe and you may end up with the greatest freiendship/relationship yet. Be natural and most of all let go of any result-it's just a call and if your too chicken for that there is always our new hide, "THE TEXT MESSAGE." Great for affairs and the sneaky stuff but I say be brave, be bold and get her on the horn..

    Guaranteed you will make her day. Never forget there are a lot of lonely woman in this town.

    reply to KAYLEE: YOUR GO TO GIRL
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    If you dig her, call her tomorrow. If she digs you, then she will be fine with it.

    The problem with most relationship advice is that it all too often it gives the "heres how to nurse this gentle flower of a budding relationship" commentary.

    The bottom line is, if they dig you, then your fuck ups and weirdness will be seen as "cute quirks", and if they don't dig you, then those things are called "red flags", (or in the worst cases "Exhibits A and B".)

    So call her, and embrace the possibility that she might dig you and you'll have a great time. OR, that she might be like most people. And most people are like a circus during an earthquake......Absolutely crazy.

    Either way, you get to pay for her drinks. And what guy doesn't love that?


    reply to Ian
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    Alek-

    Clearly, you have misconstrued the meaning of a girl giving you a phone number. You are supposed to use that information and the series of tubes known as the "interweb" to obtain personal information about the girl so that you might arrange a "chance meeting"....

    Just kidding. The real answer to you question is that, of course you should call the number. I should warn you, though. Most women don't have a 1-800- number.

    If you do call, think about what you want to say before dialing.
    Remember, she might have given you the digits because she digs you. Try not to blow that by talking.... on the other hand, if she starts rambling on about her weekend with Tom Cruise and John Travolta and extolling the virtues of L. Ron Hubbard, hang up...FAST.

    reply to Brad
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    Yes, calling the next day is fine. But make sure to make it in the afternoon. By that time, her hangover has probably subsided and the imprint of the toilet seat should have faded from her face. And you know how silly girls can be about their appearance...even on the phone...sheesh.

    reply to Barry
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    Yes, calling the next day is fine. But make sure to make it in the afternoon. By that time, her hangover has probably subsided and the imprint of the toilet seat should have faded from her face. And you know how silly girls can be about their appearance...even on the phone...sheesh.

    reply to Barry
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    I must be from a different time... no not the next day, but the day after or even the third day... too soon is just as bad as too late... it's all about timing...if you're asking for advice about it already then, you are clearing at a disadvantage here and it's too heavy already... just remember....keep it cool...

    reply to page
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    Alek wrote: I think it would have been ideal to wait longer if we didn't all ready know each other. We had classes together in first year, and only met again for the first time in three years at another party last month. Fuck, I'm doing exactly what we've all told countless people NOT to do on this website: overthinking it. I will not post again on this thread.

    Good God young Alek, if this girl knew just how much time and advice you took from all these people on whether or not to call her the next day, depending on her age, she would either be very flattered or a little nervous. There comes a time in every young mans life when he graduates from Mrs.Robinson. Good luck with coffee and trust your instincts, they got your through the front door.

    reply to Casey
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    I say definitely call her the next day. No need to play the "wait X amount of days" game. Why else would you ask for a number if you didn't plan on calling as soon as you could? You don't buy a DVD player, take it home, leave it in the box and then go make a sandwich do you? No. You hook it up.



    reply to Adam
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    You got the digits! Good for you. Absolutely call her today. Now, what's her number? I need to call her and advise her not to answer on the first ring.

    reply to Donna
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    Alek,
    You 'Sexy' thing you, YES call her. There is nothing worse than providing your number to a 'hunk' with much potential and then just sit around waiting because he NEVER called!

    Call her, and let me know how it goes:)




    Olga

    reply to Olga
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    Alek,
    You 'Sexy' thing you, YES call her. There is nothing worse than providing your number to a 'hunk' with much potential and then just sit around waiting because he NEVER called!

    Call her, and let me know how it goes:)




    Olga

    reply to Olga
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    Who invented these dumbass dating rules anyways? Like the 3 day rule...is there some creepy old man somewhere plotting in his basement the best ways to become more appealing to the younger female generation? The only time I want to play games with a guy is when I'm not interested and that is the only way to keep it interesting. If I really liked someone I would want them to call the next day..and would be a little confused if they didn't. Lets all take a vow to stop playing the games, get down to the basics, and try being honest with one another. Let's give world peace a shot too while we're at it.
    Now with that being said, and I realize I am about to contradict myself here, but don't call her yet. For one, she'll be waiting all day for the call and if you call your just going to come off as perdictable. For 2, you don't know her yet so she can't possibly like you yet, and therefore she can't possibly be confused if you don't call right away. And 3, it makes you look like you have a life (even if you don't possess the smallest trace of one), and this will actually make her want you more. Don't wait more than a day or two though...that's just rude

    reply to Christine
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    Sheís made it pretty easy for you by taking the first step, so step and let her know how lovely you think she is by getting back to her STAT. If calling tomorrow sounds ideal to you, donít be caught in a game you think you should be playing. Good luck!

    reply to Melissa
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    Personally I don't believe in stalling. Go on and give her a call! Men who show an interest without the "Joe Cool" attitude is a rarity.

    reply to Dina
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    Christ... Post an easy question and the vultures come in droves. Thanks all.

    reply to Alek
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    Yes, call her! I hate game playing, so if you like her why wait. However, don't call her at 1pm, don't confess your undying love and if she doesn't respond right away- don't keeping calling! You want to let her know that you like her, but you don't want her to think you are a stalker :)

    reply to Jennifer
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    Alek wrote: Christ... Post an easy question and the vultures come in droves. Thanks all.



    Ungrateful azz.

    reply to Keka
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    He had also said it MANY posts ago.

    Talk about undeterred.

    reply to Keka
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    Alek, definitely call her. Why wouldn't you? You never know what could have been if you don't follow through. Besides, phoning the next day puts you WAAAAAY ahead of the competition, who never phones at all. You sound like a really sweet guy. I don't think you have anything to lose. Good luck, Guy!

    reply to mia
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    Don't call her, call your mother and see if she needs anything from the store.

    reply to Deanna
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    if you meant every word..why the apology? Stand up for yourself and your beliefs.

    How did you acquire this number? Did she give it you willingly or did you have to ask or beg perhaps? If it was willingly, don't wait too long, she is obviously interested. If you had to ask (or beg), if it feels right call her right away or you can keep her waiting a day or two. this will give the appearance of interest but not desperation. Either way, You will know pretty quickly if she happy to hear from you.

    reply to Kim
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    Game playing -- waiting two, three, ten? days to call someone -- is silly. Call when you want to speak to someone.

    reply to Lorraine
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    Are you confused or am I? You write: "I think we would have to take our relationship to the next level and make a deeper commitment because of the distance..." Later you add, "I really want him to still be in my life, but I don't want us to fall back into a committed relationship, it is just too much right now." Why such things have to be so complex? Relish the moment.
    Do a "Ben Franklin", sign a contract that if the issue of "distance" is not resolved within two months, you're out. What's all this talk about "commitment". Enjoy the time that you spend together. If (and when) you see him it is perfectly fine to kiss, hold his hand, tell him that you love him, then say that because of the distance, things aren't working out and walk away. See how he reacts? It appears that you want him to make the "commitment". In the mentime, have a couple of drinks.

    reply to Saeid
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    Deanna wrote: Don't call her, call your mother and see if she needs anything from the store.

    HA! Fucking finally, some wit. Please stick around.

    reply to Alek
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    Saeid wrote: Are you confused or am I? You write: "I think we would have to take our relationship to the next level and make a deeper commitment because of the distance..." Later you add, "I really want him to still be in my life, but I don't want us to fall back into a committed relationship, it is just too much right now." Why such things have to be so complex? Relish the moment. Do a "Ben Franklin", sign a contract that if the issue of "distance" is not resolved within two months, you're out. What's all this talk about "commitment". Enjoy the time that you spend together. If (and when) you see him it is perfectly fine to kiss, hold his hand, tell him that you love him, then say that because of the distance, things aren't working out and walk away. See how he reacts? It appears that you want him to make the "commitment". In the mentime, have a couple of drinks.

    Best get that prescription altered, Gramps.

    reply to Alek
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    Alek wrote: Best get that prescription altered, Gramps.

    I'll try but I'm not sure if my doctor will do it. Thanks for the advice.

    reply to Saeid
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    Alek wrote: Best get that prescription altered, Gramps.

    I'll try but I'm not sure if my doctor will do it. Thanks for the advice.

    reply to Saeid
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    I'd say wait a day or two and when you do call her have some definite plans that you want to invite her to. A movie, a concert, a play, a new tree with cool leaves, just have something specific that you can sound excited about and say you want to share it with her. Then make out with her face.

    reply to Corey
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    If you were given a number that means she opened the door for you to call. Don't disrespect her by keeping her in the dark. Ask her out for coffee and take it from there. There is nothing worse than hoping every minute that someone will call. It just creates uncertainty about her choice to give you the number in the first place. Just be genuine and you might surprise yourself and gain a new friend. Good Luck. Tina's Two Sense!!!!!

    reply to Tina
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    Alek wrote: Best get that prescription altered, Gramps.

    I'm sorry Alek, the comment was for the lady who has boyfriend problems. Somehow it came to you. Again, my apologies.

    reply to Saeid
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    Alek wrote: Best get that prescription altered, Gramps.

    I'm sorry Alek, the comment was for the lady who has boyfriend problems. Somehow it came to you. Again, my apologies.

    reply to Saeid
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    Alek,

    based on the limited information you have
    left, and the fact that you have asked complete
    strangers to answer a question far beyond the
    scope and ability of mere mortals, i can only
    surmise that you probably don't want to call her
    and therefore shouldn't.
    However, i'm willing to work with you a little bit
    so I have graciously compiled a five question criterion
    to apply to any blind calling situation which will
    point you in the right direction.
    1. Is the party in question (whomever will be receiving
    your dubious phonecall) above the legal age, or
    as a concession, within the age of consent so long
    as you intend on coming out in the open with your intentions
    to the party's legal guardians?
    2. Does the party in question appear to have any ties
    with occult activity/terroristic involvement/association
    with communist party leaders (further, is the party in
    question tied in any way with the KGB, ODESSA, IRS,
    etc.)
    3. Has the party in question made overt vampiric references.
    I won't beat around here, you don't want to be lured into vampire society, I know eternal life sounds great, but
    the catch-22 is that vampires are really undead creatures,
    so you can kiss life goodbye. The method by which you
    can quickly ascertain whether or not the party in question is
    indeed a vampire is if she winced when you walked past
    a street preacher, or if you never saw her outside the cover of night. As an added precaution, however, many times
    vampires, and male vampires at that, not the voluptuous
    women which you might imagine, hire attractive girls to
    set them up with their next take. That pretty girl giving out
    her phone number might be your ticket to Transylvania.
    4. Did you extract the phone number from a lady of the night
    or a slick poster with a picture of some saucy looking dame?
    5. Upon parting from the party in question, did you later
    discover that certain valuable possessions were no longer
    on your person (ex: wallet, cell phone, watch, cuff links,
    rosary, clove of garlic) as a sidenote, if your clove of garlic
    has gone missing you might think you could have full assurance that she is not a vampire, and only a kleptomaniac,
    however, this is most certainly a sign that she is indeed working for a vampire organization and has stripped you
    defenseless for the gritty rondevoux in which she hopes
    to ensnare you.
    So, if you have have answered yes to 1-2 of these criterion,
    I advise you to give pause before dialing.
    If you have answered yes to 3-4 of these criterion,
    I strongly advise you to take a holiday, and maybe consider
    moving to a different side of town.
    If you have answered 'yes' on all 5 accounts, I want you
    to stop taking drugs today. The girl you met was probably
    your landlord in the stairway demanding rent.
    Ok man, good luck with the girl and everything!

    reply to joseph
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    Sure! I am not one to play games. That said, you don't wanna look desperate. I once gave my number to a guy at a bar and he called me at 3am that same morning! UGH! That's a no no. I say call her when you want, just don't text/call her more than once without hearing back (assuming you get voice mail). Good luck!

    reply to Lara
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    Well, that depends on a number of things that can happen after you dial those seven digits that are burning a hole in your pocket right now.

    Best case scenario, you call her, she answers the two of you have a slightly awkward conversation about your occupations, favorite foods, the last book you've read and any other general topics that you can speak about without making you come off as completely insane. Eventually, you go out on a date and discover that she's a little bit crazy, but not enough to scare you away. Sounds like a keeper to me!

    However, the worst case scenario would be that you call and her boyfriend (who can bench press your body weight without breaking a sweat) answers. You immediately hang up, but he has caller I.D. and calls you back. The threats begin followed by the baseball bat induced shattered windshield and finally that pesky restraining order.

    The most likely scenario would be that you call and some middle aged man named George answers the phone because dear ole Sally gave you the wrong number; but don't worry. George has a daughter and she's single.

    reply to Stephanie
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    I am a tad late to this party, but I am so glad you called her Alek and that you made arrangements to go for coffee.

    Get this -- I met one of the loves of my life on a NYC bus, and my husband, THE love of my life, while he was drunk. LOL

    Have fun at coffee!

    reply to Linda
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    Alek.... Call her. Tomorrow is fine. For some reason there are loads of men in this world who subscribe to the "three day rule." That's a pile of bollocks and we all know it. What is this three day rule intended to do? Leave her wanting more? We are talking about a potential human interaction with emotions and consequences for both individuals involved. It's not a rendition of Joseph and The Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat, where if you leave them wanting more they might throw a bouquet of daisies at you. Seriously, who wants daisies?

    The fact that you want to call her tomorrow is a good thing. It means that there's something interesting and fantastic about her that caught your eye. Maybe it was the fact that she was drinking a martini made with gin instead of vodka (i.e. she realizes you can't put just anything in a martini glass and call it a martini.) Perhaps it was because she was reading an obscure book that you read twenty times when your were fifteen. There's something about her that makes you not want to wait.

    If you feel like you need to wait then there's probably not the spark that you are looking for. You want to know the number one rule when it comes to calling a woman after she's given you her phone number? There are no rules. Well, that and you don't talk about fight club. Clearly you want to use some discretion. Don't call her while you are hopped up on whippets and lead based paint. That doesn't send the message, "I'm stable."

    Go for it man. Seriously, just go for it. We live in a terrifying world that could end tomorrow if the Aztec calendar has anything to do with it. I guarantee you that she isn't waiting by the phone for your call, because she's not a 1950's school girl. Don't deliberate over this decision ever again. If you feel like calling the next day then give her a jingle and say howdy. Later days kitten.

    reply to Erik
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    IJ wrote: Hey Alek, Good to see you called brother -- whenever a female friend asks me about guys who delay the first-ever check-in, I always say the same thing: "Boys wait -- men call.' I am yet to meet a woman who feels otherwise...enjoy the java -- IJ

    I love that...

    Boys wait.... men call!

    reply to Laura
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    Personally, I think we should hear what kind of apology-inducing message you left E. Jean to see if you're capable of delivering another telephone correspondence, buster. But, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.

    I would hold off calling the lass, for at least two days. You don't want to come off as desperate. Even though you MIGHT be desperate, you don't want to look it. So, again, wait two days then give her a ring. Keep it friendly, striaght-forward, kind, sans heavy breathing.

    I hope this helps. And if doesn't, alcohol might.

    Tally-ho!

    reply to Mike
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    Yes, if you like her, call her. Don't wait around because you feel the need to subscribe to silly societal mores or unwritten rules. There is no such thing as the 3 day rule or anything like that, just follow your heart and do what feels right. But, I agree with some of the others, don't call too often and if you don't catch her, wait for her to return your call. If she doesn't, she's probably not interested or she's playing games that you will not want to be a part of if you're smart!

    reply to Kelly
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    hey alek :)
    yes, I would say to call her.
    I don't know why guys love to hmmm and haww about calling a girl... just do it!
    Don't play games, don't try and act cool... just be yourself... trust me, girls will appreciate that the most. Plus, if you don't act yourself now, they'll be in for a shock later, so play it true...
    kayla

    reply to Kayla
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    I've yet to meet a woman who likes waiting by the phone. You should be calling her now. Worst case scenario she was drunk when you met and forgot about you already. Best case scenario this mystery girl is ready to invite you over to her skyrise condo to eat chocolate covered fruits on top of satin sheets.

    You're still reading this, aren't you? Tick-tock, my friend.

    reply to Len
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    Seriously, there is nothing more than I hate about the guy's "3 day rule", or whatever it's up to nowadays. The problem is that guys tend to think about girls in their own male perspective, when we actually hold pretty different views. For instance, a lot of guys would be more interested if a girl made them wait, but when it comes to the ladies, we have no problem if the guy calls us sooner rather than later. But don't go overboard, if you call a gal like an hour after you parted ways, that may be a little strange.

    reply to Cherylynn
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    Yea...hey... yes it's ok to give a girl a call the next day that you like, after all... finding a girl you like and not calling her is like finding an object of desire to be purchased in a Russian shopping center and not buying it...do you really think it may be still on the shelf in a few days?... hey same principal here buddy..If you like this chick.. don't let any grass grow under your feet..girls like tenacious strong objects when it relates to the male sex, and love a being atttached to a guy...who's vite-communicado......so RUNNNNNN!!!!!!!!! to the phone ..breathe slowly..and make sure you give her good voice!!!... little sound byte here..nothing gets a girl like a guy who sounds mellow and knows how to handle her... just remember, only call her once,..maybe twice in case she's dits and knows it or she's out of the country for the weekend---before she jingles back----calling back five or six times consecutive?...ottt ohhh..she might otherwise think you're sick and twisted..
    let's get rockin'.....YOU GO BOY!!!!!!!!!

    reply to Ann-Laura
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    Yes, call tomorrow.

    If you ask for her number, then don't call, she might secretly wonder if she just gave her number out to a telemarketer, or worse case scenario...she'll think you're a chicken shit.

    Or as Palin might say, "You betcha, dial, baby, dial!"

    reply to Bev
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    What happened? Did you take my divine advice?

    reply to Blondie
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    Calling after one day is certainly reasonable. It definitely sends the message that you're interested. Plus, it will give you an opportunity to determine if the number she gave you isn't her favorite Chinese takeout restaurant.

    reply to Carol
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    Call her tomorrow night. We all remember the calling that went on in Swingers, so my advice is don't be John Favereau. AND leave a short message, be to the point and warm so it all comes across as a casual but friendly interaction.

    reply to Michelle
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    Yes! If you met a girl whom you fancied and she fancied you - and most importantly she gave you her number - then by all means, pick up the phone and call her! Never leave a "lovely" girl waiting. Of course when you call make sure to ask her poignant questions about herself, such as, the things she likes to do for fun, her favourite past time, etc. Don't let her feel as if you are not interested in who she is, and be sure to ask her out for some tea, or a drink, or to dinner if the conversation pulls you in that direction. When opportunity knocks, always answer. It might be the best thing you've ever done.

    (from Nikki)

    reply to Nikki
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    Blondie wrote: What happened? Did you take my divine advice?

    Yes, as I mentioned about 100 posts above. Called and asked her out to coffee for tomorrow.

    Though I called at 8:00 PM, I think I woke her up. So it was a little weird.

    reply to Alek
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    ehvwon wrote: And the band played on...

    This is just getting sad now.

    reply to Alek
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    D
    122 posts on whether or not to call a girl. WOW.

    reply to D
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    You definitely want to call her man. I've grown quite bored of the whole "dating rules" thing; You meet someone, you HAVE to wait at least two days, you HAVE to take her out to a specific place the first time you meet. You should just call her when you feel comfortable and you can feel out the situation a little bit.

    reply to Steve
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    Alek,
    If the feeling seemed mutual, call her tomorrow. Chicks hate that alleged "three day rule" -- don't call first thing, but do call. I'd suggest at the end of a lunch break-type time. Tells her you're thinking of her AFTER you've taken care of a few things but not so far out that you're game-playing.
    Good Luck!

    reply to Janie
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    Call her collect during dinner time.

    If she pushes her food aside and accepts the charges, it's meant to be.

    reply to John
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    Are you FREAKIN KIDDING ME!!! No offense Alek, you know I love you but wow....126 posts. W-O-W

    reply to Bella
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    Steve wrote: You definitely want to call her man. I've grown quite bored of the whole "dating rules" thing; You meet someone, you HAVE to wait at least two days, you HAVE to take her out to a specific place the first time you meet. You should just call her when you feel comfortable and you can feel out the situation a little bit.

    You're right. I'll call her. Excellent advice. I wish someone else would have told me that 3 days ago.

    reply to Alek
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    Bella wrote: Are you FREAKIN KIDDING ME!!! No offense Alek, you know I love you but wow....126 posts. W-O-W

    Maybe if I post a question asking for the best way to powder my testicles, it'll break the 500 mark.

    reply to Alek
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    What the hell is this?

    Alek, I think you should never ask a question again. It apparently opens the floodgates and every single vixen leaves advice for you.

    I think it's because you're so hawt.

    reply to Karla
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    Yeah and it will take u 2 weeks to read through it

    reply to Bella
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    Yes. Call her back tomorrow if you like her and you don't want to play games. If you play phone games, you'll only attract a fellow game-player.

    reply to Rachel
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    Hey Alek,

    I would wait two days to play it cool. I know a lot of ladies might disagree with me on this theory, but I've had many friends get turned off by guys who were too intense. And calling the next day could be defined as too intense. No more than a two day wait though. That's just my opinion though.



    reply to Theodora
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    Drink some draino, and relax.

    reply to Eric
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    I would surely call the dame, but call her with plans for something the following week. Women love men who can take control. Dinner next Friday, a concert on Wednesday night. Let her know you've thought about her, and you want to take her out, but you're not an emotional noodle who just wants to cuddle in front of the television. Don't stay on the phone forever. Simply ask her out and then kindly extricate yourself. Allow her time to think about you without being bombarded by your presence.

    reply to Isabella
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    Alek, when powdering MY testicles, I always use one of them there brown-n-bags (the kind for turkey-cookiní - what can I say, I have life-threateningly large cajones), into which I toss two parts baby powder and one part cornstarch. Then go with a swirl-and-shake motion.

    Oh wait, I donít have testicles. Flashback from a previous life. My bad.

    reply to cindy
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    My Lord. I have never seen so many male vixens answer one question.
    And Alek-- you can stop the games. Just call me whenever you feel like it.

    reply to Carolyn
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